don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
