OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
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I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
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We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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