THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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