with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
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