Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
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