i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
The beer is more important than you right now.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize
