Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
