If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
pop tarts are not kleenex
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
