sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
