Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
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