She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
tell your sister to shave her snatch
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
