ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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