We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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