"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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