where am i from again
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
