We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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