What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
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You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
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Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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