I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
