there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
