Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Randomize
