Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
babies were throwing up all over the place
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
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this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
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you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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