This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
