I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
