Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
God I need to hump something, right now.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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