Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize
