my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
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