I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Randomize
