Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
