naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
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Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
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Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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