yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
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