my soul wont recognize me after tonight
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
