Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.