3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
