:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
Randomize
