Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
