im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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