...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
