he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
