I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
