I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize