So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Randomize
