Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
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