i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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