Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
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