Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I just want nice things and good sex
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize