i'm signing you up for texting rehab
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
