If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Randomize
