I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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