Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.