you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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