his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize
