why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize