Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Randomize
